A Love Letter to the Temple of God

A few weeks ago, I vandalized Gods’ temple. 

I wrote hate speech on its walls. I tore down the beautiful altars; altars that memorialized obstacles that lead to grace. I snuffed out all of the candles; candles that were lit with trembling faith and hopeful expectation. I stood in the middle of the temple and yelled out in defiance at all the prayers that had been spoken in and over that place. 

Weary of rage, ashamed, and scared; I knew I wasn’t alone. A distant, gentle voice reminded me, “Don’t you realize that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So, you must honor God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20, NLT).

MAKING MY BODY A TEMPLE

The many times I had read this Scripture before, I was attempting another diet, a spiritual fast, or a new exercise regimen. I used this Scripture to keep me focused on the goal of “making” my body a temple, suitable for the dwelling place of the Holy Spirit. Yet, all the while I was making a charge towards my goals, my mind was an avalanche of negative self-talk and memories of failure waiting to be released the second I misstepped. When the avalanche would fall, so would I, under the dark abyss of defeat. After so many attempts at a healthier me, with the same avalanche of an outcome, I gave up. For five years, I did nothing to help my physical health. I ignored the weight gain by not looking in the mirror and not looking at people’s astonished faces at the dramatic changes in my body.

MY BODY IS A TEMPLE

Yet, through all of this, the Holy Spirit never left His Temple. As a matter of fact, we grew closer. He showed me who I truly was in Christ through Bible study. I found the things that gave me comfort or pleasure, I no longer desired. I regained confidence in areas I thought were no longer mine to have because I had chosen to bury my gifts under the weight of lack of use. The Holy Spirit and I even made some positive changes toward my physical health, and it felt really good. I was gaining new and confident ground under the banner of Christ, but the avalanche was looming and started to lose balance again. I knew it was coming. The signs were there. Isolation, inconsolable sadness, and the worst of them, the words. This time, I had new knowledge. I knew where this soul-crushing darkness was coming from. “Ask for prayer,” the Holy Spirit reminded me, “Ask for prayer.” I quickly sent a message to my sisters in Christ, and while I proceeded to vandalize the Temple of God, my friends were praying for me.

LIES I UNCOVERED

The disappointment I felt in myself for allowing the hit was the first lie. I spoke truth to it, “For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 6:12, NLT). The self-criticism for not “having it together” was the next lie. I spoke truth to it, “You are my servant for I have chosen you and will not throw you away. Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand” (Isaiah 41:9-10, NLT). My friends took on my sadness without asking questions. They sent me Scripture and text messages to let me know they were praying for me. It’s good to have people in our corner to tag in and fight for us when we can’t.

After a few days of quiet, I began to write this blog to serve as a reminder that I am never alone, physically, or spiritually. This is my first step in rebuilding the altars of victory I had torn down in my storm. This is a love letter to myself inspired by the Holy Spirit who dwells in me, NO MATTER WHAT. 

Dear Temple of God,

You are a child of God. God himself has chosen you and has adopted you as His child. He no longer sees your sins because Christ has reconciled you to the Father. There is nothing you have to do to earn your place. Raquel, you are loved. You have been made whole in your uniqueness. You are free to be your beautiful, individual self because condemnation no longer has a hold on you. You have been given a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. Raquel, you have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit as a minister of reconciliation. Be confident in all you do because you have been established, anointed, and sealed by your Father who loves you.

Don’t forget this,

Me

DISCOVER GOD’S LOVE FOR YOU 

Writing a love letter of truth to myself helped me to see all the wonderful ways God loves me NO MATTER WHAT. If you find yourself feeling blue and need a reminder of God’s love, write yourself a letter. First, do some research, Google, “Who I am in Christ.” Start a journal and take the time to write out each verse. Then underline the truths about you. Use the truths you find to write your letter. Friend, God loves us so much. Peace be with you.