If you asked me a few months ago how I was doing emotionally, I would have told you I was an emotional train wreck. I felt unseen, forgotten, and not needed by anyone, especially by God. Although part of me knew these irrational thoughts and feelings were far from God’s truth – it was much easier to believe them than it was to fight past them, run to God, and seek out his life-giving word. Instead of running to the cross, I gaven power to these irrational thoughts that had quickly spread like wildfire; leaving me feeling defeated, abandoned, and utterly alone. In other words, my emotions were running my life.
When Home Isn’t Home Anymore
You may know that feeling when you’ve been traveling on a long journey and you open the door to your home and…ahhhhh….there’s that feeling of relief, rest, and contentment. You suddenly remember that there really is no place like home. There’s also a coming-of-age phenomenon many people discover after they go off to college or move out on their own and then they’re back at their childhood “home” in their “hometown,” and yet can’t wait to go back to their new city or home. Home isn’t home anymore.
Why Resolutions Don’t Work
As the temperature starts to rise and the flowers start to bloom, we know that spring is in the air. Wait, spring? Oh no! Where did time go? Is it me, or does it feel like we just skipped the first quarter of the year?
Positions and Promises
A few weeks ago, I sat across my friend at lunch and shared with her how weary I’ve been feeling and that I’m struggling to bring that before The Lord. She then asked, “How do you think the Lord is viewing you?” I started crying, knowing that even though I know in my head how He views me, in my heart I believed that He was annoyed with me for always coming to Him with the same struggles. For that reason, I didn’t feel the freedom or desire to come before Him.
When you realize again that what you do is not who you are
By 9 A.M. all manner of positive thinking has gone out the window. I’ve got 3 patients arriving at the same time, orders weren’t put in correctly for a patient (again…) doctors are irritated for no apparent reason, I can’t get an IV started on a patient, and we’re short staffed and don’t have coverage for breakfast breaks. (“Hangry” is a real thing, people!) Yes, I do take care of people, meet them in a vulnerable place, and comfort them before heading into surgery. Yes, I’ve witnessed some of the coolest medical anomalies ever, including a 76 pound tumor get safely removed from a woman’s abdomen. But many days I come home wondering if any of it really mattered. If I really made a difference at all. I think, “God, are you here? Where are you in the midst of all this craziness, pressure, sickness and negativity? I need to […]
More Than Enough
To kick off 2017, I was encouraged by one of my friends to join her in a 21-day fast. Since I had never fasted before, I did not know what to expect, but my hope was to experience more of Christ in my life.
Losing the Forest for the Trees
Have you ever been so caught up in the details of a thing that you miss the big picture? Have you been so focused on checking things off a list that you miss why you have the list to begin with? Do you feel overwhelmed with the “to do” and forget what “is finished?” If so, you’re probably losing the forest for the trees.
Jesus Wants to Flip the Tables In Our Hearts
With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, I can’t help but pause and remember one year in my college bible study when we made each other valentines with bible verses. At the time the popular verse rang so dear to me since I was so new in my faith. But now that I’ve grown in my relationship with God, I feel like they limit Jesus’ expression of love for us. I’m challenged to think about the moments when He convicted His disciples. What about the times when He was angry with them? What about the time He flipped tables in the temple?
Loving others more, when we love them less than Jesus
“You’re not my world” “You don’t complete me” “You’re not my everything” “I can live without you”
Is your branch connected to the vine?
First and foremost, I want to say a Happy New Year from all of the writers here at All The More! We are so thankful for each and every one of you! As I ring in 2017, sitting at home watching the ball drop, I can’t help but to process and pick apart all that 2016 was for me. And if I’m being honest, it wasn’t really all that great. It wasn’t horrible, (I’m sure others had a much more trying year than I had), but it wasn’t exactly great either. I was unemployed for majority of the summer. I lost my last grandparent and a very close family friend. The stress of an ongoing complicated living situation was emotionally draining. Add in all of the commitments I agreed to; from leading a small group, serving on the board of an academic honor society, and being involved in a young […]